Performance Reviews are Counterproductive

1982 – Dr W. Edwards Deming– The Father of the Quality Evolution
“Evaluation of performance, merit rating, or annual review…the idea of a merit rating is alluring. The sound of the words captivates the imagination: pay for what you get; get what you pay for; motivate people to do their best, for their own good. The effect is exactly the opposite of what the words promise.”

2018 – Marcus Buckingham– Thought Leader of the Strengths Revolution
“…the problem with performance reviews is that they are not useful. They don’t tell us anything about the employee, they don’t help the employees get better, and they certainly aren’t giving us the correct information we need to hire, fire, train, and promote our people.”

For over 35 years the approach to performance management has been broken and it is time to fix it. We are often forced to participate in the distasteful performance review process cycle as well as having been victims of its performance crushing results. The system is counterproductive, perpetuates mediocrity, is certainly arbitrary and may be illegal. It’s time to disrupt the status quo with recognition of the problem and move forward with better solutions.

In the next several postings we will explore the failings and impact of the current approach to performance management as well as offer solutions for better results. We will look at the performance review and how it perpetuates mediocrity and limits associate development. We will expose common performance management approaches for their bias and ineffectiveness. Additionally, we will come to see that “pay for performance” is really “pay for perception”. Most importantly, we will develop solutions for a better result and discuss things we can do to bend the system until more enlightened leaders and approaches are put in place.

So why do we do performance management at all? What is its purpose? Let’s be perfectly frank, businesses operate in their own best interest. It is in the businesses’ primary interest to maximize productivity and profitability while keeping expenses manageable. Consequently the actions businesses take are to further their competitiveness and improve their profitability now and in the future. The reason that businesses are involved in performance management at all is that they believe the process will yield a net benefit in line with their primary goals.

In an era of disruptive product introductions and fierce competition, businesses are under great pressure to redesign themselves while managing declining margins and creating new products to meet new market needs. Businesses, especially service-based businesses are looking for a way to sort through their resources (their most controllable expense) and optimize capabilities for their current and future needs. Said more simply, businesses are trying to figure out who is the most productive, who has the ability to meet future business needs and how to manage the remaining resources while remaining profitable.

When we hear that businesses consider their workforce to be their greatest asset or care deeply about associate engagement and associate development, it is because they have determined that these programs are necessary to maintain or enhance their competitive advantage. They are not engaging in these activities out of a deeply altruistic perspective, but as a means to achieve their profitability goals. Businesses are interested in performance management as a means to understand their return on investment in their workforce.

Somewhere along the way in their effort to patch together tools to assess, manage and direct the development of their workforce, business assembled a collection of policies and practices that are completely ineffective and backwards. They de-motivate, are biased to the point of not being able to ensure talent continuity, reward mediocre performance, and truly place the business at risk. It is time to make a change.

In the next segment we will take a closer look at the failings of the performance review process and offer some suggestions for improvements. Have I piqued your interest? I hope so. Let me know your thoughts on this in our comments section below.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Say No

“No is a complete sentence” – Anne Lamott

If we are going to achieve our goals, at times we will be saying no to things that might be fun, interesting or rewarding. The reality is that we simply do not have the capacity to do everything. Furthermore, we would not want to take on everything that comes our way since it may not align with our goals. There comes a time when we just have to say no. So how do we decide what to pursue and what to eliminate or postpone?

No is one of the shortest words in the English language yet it seems to be one of the hardest words to say. Ironically, it’s one of the first words we learned to say. So many things come at us at an ever-increasing pace with so many people demanding our attention it is hard to focus on what we should do. Consequently, we try to do it all. Even when attempting to apply a mental matrix of urgent vs. important, everything seems to fall into urgent and important. We find ourselves trying to please everyone and subordinating our priorities to our spare time, which disappears into exhaustion.

The net result is that our energy goes down and our stress goes up. We expend energy on things that in the end may not drive our personal satisfaction and that alone causes stress. We stress about taking on things that we know are not in alignment with our talents and what we want to accomplish. We see work being done and gain satisfaction from its completion, but not the deep-down gratification satisfaction that comes from achieving something that helps to move us forward. This is why we have goals.

Our goals serve as a filter and a compass to sort out the opportunities that align our action with the direction we planned. As we have the opportunity to start a new activity, our goals provide the guidelines that help us make a good decision for the use of our time. If the opportunity is in alignment with the planned work we had identified in our current goals, then we know that it is an opportunity that will make the best use of our time. If we cannot find alignment between the activity and our goal, then it becomes clear that we should take a pass on the proposed opportunity.

In my book “EXCELLENCE: You CAN Get There From Here!”, I lay out a complete process for developing and managing to goals. It contains both a long-term planning process to determine our direction as well as a short-term planning process to set goals and manage our progress.

This brings us full circle on this topic. If the opportunity is not in alignment with our goals, then we use the shortest sentence in the English language and just say no. This may be a hard thing to do and refusing the opportunity will certainly have an impact on the person providing the opportunity. As smart leaders we know to accomplish our goals, we will have to say no to some of the opportunities, activities and demands from our friends, family and colleagues.

Here are 4 tips for evaluating alignment with our goals:

1) Alignment with goals – Is this opportunity in alignment with our goals? Is this something we have identified as directionally beneficial along our journey? Compare to our goals for the year and evaluate the opportunity without emotion.

2) Urgent vs. Important – How does the opportunity measure against the Urgent vs. Important test? Is it something that we have to do now or can we pick the time to pursue this opportunity?

3) Capacity management – Do we have the capacity to take this on now, or are we going to have to take a pass on it this time? There is no point in overloading ourselves, even if the opportunity is directionally appropriate when measured against our current plans.

4) Anticipated benefit – What do we anticipate to gain from this opportunity? Assuming it is directionally beneficial, does it yield a great new learning or does it polish a current understanding? If we can only choose one, we may want to consider reaching for the larger learning opportunity.

Once again we find that having goals for each year or season is incredibly important and serves to help us choose between options and opportunities. We can be sure that we are maximizing the use of our energy to provide an accomplishment that moves us in the right direction and is deeply satisfying. Let’s keep the stress in check and let our goals make the decision easier and sometimes, just say no.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Pay Attention

“The secret to engaging our people is to pay attention.” — Skip Gilbert

Is our team truly engaged in their work? Do they see their efforts producing success in our organization or are they just putting in their time? Are they contributing with all of their creativity and energy or just doing what they are told? Do they believe we are headed in the right direction? Do they feel appreciated for their contributions? Do they have confidence in their leader? The success of our organization and leadership may be defined by how the members of our teams answer these questions.

In this video I will do a 2 minute summary of the blog post “Pay Attention” on SkipGilbert.com. Join me as we take time to review a few pointers on becoming a more effective leader.

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Servant Leader

“We succeed when we help other succeed.” — Skip Gilbert

Are we leaders or rulers? Do we tell people what to do or do we support the needs of those producing the results? The answer to these questions may very well set the tone for our success or limit our results.

As a leader, when we view the hierarchy of our organization, do we see ourselves at the top or bottom of the pyramid? Do we see ourselves sitting at the top of the chart needing to direct a group that follows our commands or do we see ourselves at the bottom of the chart facilitating the productive accomplishment of our mission? Let me ask this in a different way, are we leading an organization that needs to be told what to do next, or are we enabling the resources in our care to deliver their best performance in accomplishment of our goals? The answer makes a big difference in the type of organization we will build and our ultimate success.

If we see ourselves as the top of the organization and those below us as a necessary means to execute our commands, then we most likely subscribe to an autocratic style of leadership. In this model we typically prefer to have clearly defined tasks and closely monitor the activity and results. We prefer to make the decisions and highly value those that can follow our instructions. We generally leverage our experience and observations to make decisions that are intended to produce the outcomes we desire.

If we see ourselves as sitting at the bottom of an inverted triangle in our organization chart, we most likely view our role as being one of setting a vision, empowering teams or individuals to meet our goals and helping to facilitate their success. In this model we typically see ourselves as a servant-leader, one that sees a world bigger than just ourselves. This model is characterized by seeking a high level of participation in decision-making and delegating the work to those more capable to deliver. We generally benefit from gathering information and experiences from a broader audience to make a more informed decision that has greater buy-in. Having produced a decision, we then see our role as serving those that will execute the work and supporting their needs and efforts.

So which is smarter, a single individual or a the collective wisdom of many perspectives? Who knows the true outcome of a decision better, the people that perform the work or an individual that interjects their perception of the work? In most cases the likelihood of success is enhanced by having greater input into a decision with a larger buy-in to the outcome. In most instances the higher level of participation will yield greater ownership of the decision and better results.

So how does this work? I have finally achieved a level of responsibility and authority to have a larger level of influence in my organization and you are telling me that I now work for them? Exactly!! There is only so much work we can accomplish as an individual. Even with more hands and feet available to do our bidding, they can only accomplish what we instruct them to do and are limited to doing it the way we have instructed it to be done. As a leader, this will quickly become a limiting factor in the ability of our organization to adapt to ever-changing conditions and to overcome obstacles. In addition, we are not being good stewards of our resources by not tapping into their vast knowledge and experience to collectively produce a better result.

This can be really uncomfortable for the truly autocratic-style leader. Being in charge and forcing what seems like better decisions may feel comfortable. However in the end it will be our downfall. Once we run out of ideas and those around us become dependent on us to do their thinking, we will be at the limit of our organization’s capability.

As a smart leader, we are better serving the needs of our organization and our goals when we provide a vision, engage the thinking of our resources and then help them accomplish their work. It does not mean becoming passive in our role or accepting mediocrity as an operating norm. Quite the opposite, it requires an intelligent, engaged and confident leader to operate in this manner. It means setting a vision and clearing the road for our resources. It means involving more people in decision-making and helping to develop their thinking to make better decisions.

Here are 4 tips for being a servant-leader:

1) It starts with trust. We must first have trust in our leadership capabilities to move beyond the autocratic command and control model of leadership. The second level of trust comes with building a relationship with those around us. We must trust that we are in the outcome together and that this is not just a scheme to avoid responsibility and place blame.

2) We have to be consistent in our leadership style. If we truly believe that the servant-leader model will produce better results for us then we need to be consistent in our application of its principles. Going back to our autocratic mode will set back our progress and reduce trust.

3) Help people be successful. Their success drives our success. Listen to their feedback, remove roadblocks, be fair and transparent, and help people accomplish more. They will be happier and we will achieve our goals. A very good combination.

4) Drive for Excellence. Good enough will never do. We are creating a powerful machine when we unleash the creative thinking of smart empowered people. Do not be tempted to set our expectations too low. Reach for Excellence everyday.

It works. Take a look around at truly effective and successful leaders and you will find these characteristics. They produce organizations that operate with excellence and sustained success. Watch out for the imitators, they are just a flash in the pan.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Stay Positive

Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will. — Zig Ziglar

How often have you heard or thought the following? I have never seen things this bad. Things are really messed up. I am not surprised that happened, bad things are always happening to me. That can never work, it has never worked before. I really don’t see things getting better. I am really worried, the last time something like this happened it was really bad. I know I hear them quite frequently and often times find these things running through my own thoughts.

We have a natural tendency to seek the negative. It is probably in our ancestral DNA as a leftover defense mechanism for detecting danger. It may have helped our ancestors remain alert to hidden dangers and gave them an edge when facing a physical challenges. For us, it is a part of our nature that can get out of control and actually create danger for us. As this negative thought process tends to support worry and stress, it can drag us down both physically and emotionally. This leads to a chain reaction of worry and stress that consumes our energy, reinforces unrealistic concerns and robs us of our creativity. Ultimately, it robs us of our ability to appreciate and enjoy today.

In fact, this negative worry and stress cycle can lead to a condition called rumination. This is a term used to describe a process where by we relive a past negative experience including the emotions involved in a never ending cycle of preoccupation. We relive a single emotional event over and over again, remembering all of the bad things that happened and how that felt. This puts us back in that same situation again bringing those fear emotions to the surface that were originally meant to stir our action for survival. However, now they serve no purpose because we no longer need them. We survived. We are not currently in danger, but we make ourselves feel that way repeatedly. We have to break the cycle.

Negative things happen all around us everyday, we can’t avoid them. Ultimately we need to find a way to stay positive or we will be forever drawn into the worry-cycle that robs us of our happiness. We have to reprogram ourselves to see the positive. There are many techniques available to us to help us see the positive and stay that way. However, first we have to break the rumination cycle and stop letting our survival emotions keep us from achieving perspective on our past event and let us process it away.

One of the best techniques to break the rumination cycle is to reflect on events in the third person as it helps to remove the emotion. We no longer need the emotion, we are no longer in danger. We do not need the adrenalin boost to get out of danger. We just need to be able to process this event like any other event. A very helpful technique is to restate the situation from the perspective of a bystander also known as third person. State the event as if we are an observer. Say it simply and without emotion. After all, through the eyes of a third party, it was just another event. This is not meant to minimize the seriousness of the event, but just get us out of the action.

We will be surprised at just how much different the event replays when it is no longer happening to us. We will then see it without the fight or flight emotion of being the victim and be able to engage our reasoning to work our way through this event like we would any other event. Typically, we are able to analyze our experiences, learn what we can and abandon the rest. We do not dwell on the past or even relive the event, we just add what we have learned to our library of experiences.

To be happy there is very little other choice.

Here are 4 tips to help us stay positive:

1) Talk to other people – Approach other people with a positive demeanor and it is amazing how they will reflect it back. If we find we are surrounded by negative people, perhaps we should consider associating with a different crowd.

2) List the good things that happened today – Make a list of even the smallest things. We will be surprised at just how many there are. We have a lot to be thankful for and this can help to remind us of our bounty.

3) Retrain our mind – Catch ourselves when we start to think negative thoughts and set those thoughts aside. It is sometimes easier said than done, but it is essential that we change our way of thinking.

4) Exercise mind and body – Go for a walk and/or do a puzzle. Occupy ourselves in a different manner that does not allow us to dwell on the negative. When we fill our time with current challenges and enjoy the present it is far easier to have a positive outlook.

Staying positive is an essential life-skill. To be at our best and enjoy our everyday existence we have to be able to put the bad things behind us and stay positive in our outlook.  Embrace how thankful we are for what we have today.

I am thankful that you took the time to read this. I look forward to reading about your thoughts on this.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Our Reputation is our Currency

“It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to lose it.” — Benjamin Franklin

One of our greatest assets is our reputation. Our reputation is a reflection of our character and our calling card for our future. Our reputation is the current accumulation of the impression others hold of our accomplishments. It is the net result of what we have done and the way we have done it. Even those who have chosen to produce nothing have a reputation. We each have a reputation. There is no escaping the fact that others consider our credibility and set expectations based on our reputation, and that either opens or closes doors for our future.

Our reputation serves to provide opportunity or stand in our way to our next success. In a way, it serves as a form of currency. We add to our account when we accomplish something that produces respect in the eyes of our observers. When we complete a task or activity or produce something of value, the net result of that accomplishment gets credited to our reputation. Completing a project with excellence, helping someone in need, taking time to teach another, producing a better widget, all are things that get credited to our account in a positive way. Think of these as a net deposit to our account.

We make withdrawals from our account when we do something that damages our reputation. Claiming someone else’s work as our own, not meeting our commitment, not completing the work we were paid to produce and other things of that nature, withdraw from our account. The rate of withdrawal may be much more rapid than the rate of deposit of positive experiences.

We borrow from our account when we ask other people to trust us or to trust someone else based on our recommendation. When we ask people to move forward with something they are not sure about, they do so based on the value of our reputation. If in their eyes we have proven knowledgable and trustworthy then they will take a risk based on our advice. We have loaned out our credibility and reputation in the form of trust. If our advice proves trustworthy then our account will be credited with interest. If our advice proves not to be trustworthy, then we will have lost the value of their trust and reduce the balance in our reputation account.

Everything we do or say impacts our reputation and impacts how other people see us. With every interaction we are either adding or subtracting from our balance. We either continue to prove our trustworthiness or we diminish it. Every transaction either adds or subtracts from our account.

More than ever our reputation is being measured in public. Social media like Facebook and Twitter make it extremely convenient for others to vocalize their opinions of us. Metrics are available such as likes or retweets. If we publish, our readers may make comments. When we produce something our product may be reviewed on Amazon or Yelp and our comments may produce reactions. Consider that even our credit rating is a measure of our reputation. All of these things drive the total picture of who we are and either raise or lower the balance in our reputation account.

Our reputation is earned, not inherited or purchased. There is no amount of money that can buy a good reputation. Money may be spent to create positive messages, but in the end it is the people that we interact with that determine our reputation. Eventually, our true character will filter through the publicity and set the tone of our reputation. Our reputation is driven by our actions and how they are perceived by others.

It takes a long time to build a positive balance in our account but we can throw it away in a few minutes. We need to be careful how we spend our reputation. Do we continue to use it as capital to build greater success or do we throw it away by compromising our values?

Here are 4 tips for managing our reputation account:

1) Live our values. Ultimately our true values will be revealed. We are better served to understand our values and live up to our standards. Anything else will eventually be revealed in our reputation.

2) Think before we act. Is this action something that we could be proud of or does it fall short of our character? Pause to evaluate our action and not just follow the crowd.

3) Consider how our actions will be perceived. We need to act according to our values, but we need to do so in a way that considers how it will be received. Act in a manner that is encouraging and uplifting, even if the action is providing adjusting feedback.

4) Learn from our mistakes. We are not perfect and it is beyond our capability to be so. However, we can strive to do better next time. As we demonstrate our commitment to following our values our failures will be diminished and our reputation will be reinforced.

In the end it is all about living up to our values and making sure our actions reflect that. The accumulation of the net of our deposits and withdrawals from our account sets the value of our reputation.

Thank you for spending time with me today. I am very interested in hearing more about how you spend your reputation account.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Get Out of Our Own Way for Success

Have you ever felt like things are just going too good, there must be something bad around the corner? Or things are starting to go well, I’m afraid to change anything because I may mess it up? Or how about, things seem to be stable now, but I know something bad is about to happen? I know at times I have had these thoughts, how about you?

If we are having these thoughts, we need to get them under control. Anticipating that something bad will happen just because nothing bad is happening at the moment is a formula for failure. We are expending energy focusing on things that may (or may not) happen rather than enjoying this moment of success and pouring our energy into creating more success. Sometimes we just need to get out of our own way.

We may find that we are afraid of success. We dream big and develop good plans that are leading to success and then as success approaches, we become apprehensive in accepting the results of our success. As an example, we may have developed a great breakthrough that will significantly improve a critical process at work. As we move forward with implementing our idea, we are overwhelmed with anxiety around the small risk that it will fail. The pressure builds as we realize that we will have to make a number of presentations to the executives to get everyone to follow the new procedure. All of the energy we put into worry is just wasted effort. Our effort will more than likely be successful and our anxieties are usually overblown. We need to maintain the same confidence we had in ourselves at the start of the effort all the way through the end of the effort and things will be just fine.

When we sabotage ourselves we may find our impending success is not as impactful as it could be. We may find that we are pursuing something that will bring success and we either knowingly or subconsciously start doing things that will limit the success. For example, we may be pursuing our big breakthrough project and then stop doing the follow-through on our communications as effectively as we are able, such that the success may not end up being everything we know it could be. Again, our fear that the results may be bigger than we are or may expose our perceived shortcomings causes us to try to diminish the level of success. We are just getting in our own way.

By focusing on the negative possibilities we risk bringing on the negative consequences we are projecting. Much like when learning to ride a bicycle for the first time, we see the hole in the road and are so afraid of hitting it we actually drive right into it. When we become overly focused on the negative, we lose our perspective and end up being drawn into the thing we are trying to avoid.

Basically, we are on a path for success and we get in our own way. The solution is to get out of our own way! The things we do to produce the success are the things we need to do to secure the success. We are more than able to follow-through on our good ideas. The success that comes our way as a result of our hard work is success that we deserve and we should enjoy it. Don’t stop short of the finish line, we are actually about to win the race!

So what can we do to get out of our own way? Here are 4 tips to help us.

1) Be consistent in our approach. Keep going with the things that have brought us this far. Keep going when we are starting to feel the pressure of success.

2) Maintain our confidence. Battle our own insecurities with confidence. Be complete in our preparation for the challenge. If giving a presentation, be sure to take time to develop it and rehearse. Be in the position of knowing the subject better than anyone else and we will have nothing to worry about. We are the expert and it will be apparent that we know what we are talking about.

3) Continue to be bold in our thinking. Bold thoughts put us on this path, bold thoughts brought us this far, bold thoughts will take us across the finish line.

4) Recognize those that helped. Chances are we are not the only ones involved in the success. Be sure to share the success with everyone involved. Do not make the success about us, but make it about everyone who helped and the success will flow back to us.

We did the work, things are looking good, now bring home the success! We deserve it and so do those around us. Be the leader all the way across the finish line, we are winning the race!

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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Take Time to Listen

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” — Winston Churchill

Take time to listen to people. It is easy advice and it makes sense and yet seems very hard to incorporate as a habit. We are all very busy and when we get the chance to communicate one-on-one we often find that we are not really listening to the other person, we are just using the time that they are speaking to frame-up our next thought. That is not communication, that is speechmaking. Communication requires that someone is listening.

While stating our opinion and offering advice feels good and is important, there are times when refraining from talking and just pausing to listen can be even more effective and persuasive. Listening without distraction, really listening to the other person can help us better understand the issue being discussed. By taking time to truly listen we also provide space for the other person to provide perspective that may alter our next thought. Additionally, pausing to listen provides the feedback that we value their opinion.

While this seems readily apparent, it is not our common practice. We tend to pause to allow the other person to talk but not process what they are saying and just use the time to formulate our next attack on their perspective. Sometimes we use the filibuster technique of monopolizing the available time for conversation under the belief that if the other person does not get a chance to object, they must agree. Of course, in reality that does not work, it only serves as a barrier to keep the other persons perspective out of the conversation (or should I say monologue). In fact it really sets up conflict as the other person has to battle to get their perspective heard at all.

We will be much more effective leaders and partners if we take the time to listen; really listen. Stop, take a breath, ask a leading question and then listen to what the other person has to say. Chances are we actually value what the other person has to say or we would not have allowed the opportunity for this conversation to take place. We benefit from the perspective of other people, so let the other person talk. We will probably learn something as well as reinforce a give-and-take relationship for future conversations.

Nothing bad is going to happen to us as a result of listening. We can always ignore the advice or feedback if it does not fit. We do not always believe everything we hear, but hearing it does give us the opportunity to evaluate our perspective. There is no downside to being a good listener.

We all could do a better job of listening. Here are some tips for being a better listener:

1) Listening is more than hearing – Take time to understand what the other person is trying to convey. It is important to them or they would not be wasting their time on you. Be patient and return the favor.

2) If your mind is wandering, focus – Focus on the other person and for those few minutes put the other distractions out of our mind. Give them the respect we want of our opinion.

3) Resist jumping into the conversation with your opinion – Be patient and let them finish. Their opinion is not any more final than yours. Let them have their say.

4) Facilitate the conversation by asking for more – Take an interest and ask follow-up questions. You may even have the opportunity to make your point by engaging them in pertinent questions on their position.

Of course, don’t let people waste your time. If in the course of listening the conversation becomes one-sided or irrelevant, politely find a way to either change the subject or end the conversation. Ultimately the relationship is more important than a few minutes of our time, so be patient. There may be times others may feel the same way about what we are saying. Being polite costs us nothing.

When we truly take time to listen, we will be surprised at the results. We will have more balanced relationships, learn more, and actually elevate others perception of us as a result of being a good listener. Thank you for taking time to listen to me, I look forward to listening to you.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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There is Nobody Like You

“We are perfectly designed to be who we are.” — Skip Gilbert

We are each individual masterful creations, unique in our talents, experiences and our dreams. There is nobody like us and nobody else can fulfill our mission. We are perfectly designed to be who we are. Sometimes we lose track of who we are or why we are here. It is easy to be swept up in the busyness of the days that turn into the busyness of the years and lose track of just how valuable we are. It is easy to be swept into the thinking that we are part of a group and transfer our identity to being a member of that group and not realize the we are fully unique in every way. While the path toward the future may be hazy, the trail we leave is perfectly clear.

Interesting enough, as I look back on my career, I can see that it was in fact a straight path to where I am now. Each piece lined up to facilitate the success of the next step and allowed me to continue on my journey toward excellence.

In hindsight I see that what I learned in one situation I was able to apply to the next and keep my progress moving forward. The path change only facilitated the growth to the point where I am now as a unique individual. Nobody else has been down the path I have been down and nobody has had the same experiences and shares precisely the same talents. As a unique individual I am at the point of being a unique asset to any situation or organization that solicits my assistance.

It is the same of for all of us, we are all unique individuals with a unique set of talents and experiences. Nobody else has the same background or has the exact same history. The perspective we have developed is uniquely our own and that makes us a highly valuable resource overall.

We are on a unique journey and have a unique mission that only we can accomplish. It does not matter what others think is the right path to get to the destination, our path is unique and all our own. It is that uniqueness that leads to our ability to provide a perspective unlike anyone else.

Sometimes we wander off our path and try to be like others, but it is really a wasted effort. They have a unique set of talents and experiences and as a result they have a unique perspective all their own. We can never really think like someone else so to try to do so is just a waste of time. We are pursuing our own destiny and we are the only ones that will be at the destination at the end of our journey.

There will always be someone better than we are. No matter how hard we try, there will always be someone more capable, more experienced with a reputation as a greater authority. There will always be someone who is more attractive, has more money, more outgoing or more talented. It is just the way things are. We will never be the best at anything other than being ourselves.

However, we should never let that stand in our way. Our mission does not require their talents and capabilities, our mission is uniquely designed that only we can fulfill the requirements. There is nobody better at being us than we are.

Now let’s go forward and with the full confidence of our unique value, be ourselves.

Here are some practical steps for being ourselves:

1) Make a list of our best qualities. Make a list of all of the positive things we know about ourselves. Just a short list will do. Be sure to notice that these are attributes of a good person.

2) Make a list of the things that make us laugh at ourselves. Include things like, I can’t dance, but I do it anyway, I can step over a big obstacle, but I will trip over the smallest crack,… Notice that none of these are so bad after all when we are able to keep them in perspective.

3) Make a list of the people you have helped this week. Even in the smallest things, we will find that we do more for the people than we realize.

4) Make a list of the people who are around us daily. We will find that we touch the lives of more people than we realize.

As we examine our list we will find that we are really very amazing individuals. We help other people even in the smallest things, have a balanced perspective of ourselves and are highly talented.

Now go forward and be yourself. There has never been anyone else like you and there never will be anyone like you ever again. Just be yourself.

Thank you for being a valuable individual as a contributor to our community. I look forward to reading your comments on this subject.

Thanks,

Skip Gilbert

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